Imagine this girl is doing her regular routine and she's got her hair in one of those towel hats that I can never get to stay together. She gets her yogurt, cus she's a girl and only girls eat yogurt, then takes her birth control pill. Few minutes pass and BAM! Yogurt all over the kitchen floor. Yogurt companies alienate half the market by choosing women as their sole demographic in their advertising. Anyway, bitch just puked. Gross.
She's all kinds of sick and she calls in to work and then plops down with some Neo Citran and her Friends DVD box set to feel like shit for the rest of the day. Her boyfriend comes home from work, sees her and gets all giddy and makes an innuendo about chicken "noodle" soup. This dude had some kind of weird shit happen to him when he was a child and now he's got a fetish for sick people. Nothing gets his goat more than housecoats and clammy skin.
He pounces on her like a West-African pouncing monkey and even though she feels shitty she thinks maybe it might take her mind off wanting to ralph so she goes along with it without giving it too much consideration. Meanwhile, her birth control is swaddled in yogurt dampened paper towel in the trash bin. That bitch just got a flu baby. Think about it.
Yoplait is sexist machine fueled by bacteria.
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