All of the dumb bullshit you have to do in order to stay alive is annoying. Almost your entire life is spent keeping yourself from dying or breaking down.
Eating is just a pain in the ass. You have to go buy groceries over and over again and then take them home and make food. Eating is alright sometimes but for the most part it's just something you have to do so you just shovel some stomach coal down your throat and just keep on chuggin on. It's all just going to be poop anyways. Half of the time I spend grocery shopping is spent making sure I don't buy some kind of no-fat trickery and the other half is spent just looking down the aisles and knowing that it's all going to be shit soon. If they just stocked the shelves with shit and we bought it, ate it, shit it out and sold it back to the grocery store I think we'd all be paradoxically happier at the end of the day.
Sleep is a pain in the ass. You die and go to heaven and St. Peter says "What have you done to deserve to get in here?" and you reply "Welp, for half of my time on Earth I was a good person and whatnot. Then for the other half of it I spent it doing fuck all." The dude would look at you, stamp "null and void" on your forehead and then send you off to purgatory.
Then there's so much shit you have to do to keep all your crap working. The bathroom is basically a garage. If something breaks down inside you then you're basically useless and have to get hoisted up so doctors can prod at all your wiring and shit. I'm just glad that in Canada you don't have to pay parts and labour.
By the time you do all this stuff to keep yourself operational you've pretty much wasted your whole life just trying to survive. You get like a couple hours a day to actually enjoy it and then all you do with that window is check Twitter. Cheetahs don't do anything but run at food and then eat it. They just barely survive and they look perfectly content. I've never in my life seen a Cheetah with a problem. Cheetahs don't need Twitter and doctors and herbal shampoo for fine or oily hair with bullshit lilac moisturizing additives.
Bodies suck. Cheetahs are cool
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